LisaMore

Writing What Is Me

Refill

Elle Varner- “Refill” has been playing on repeat in my head for the past three days. Besides the fact it is an extremely catchy song, there is just something about thinking about a guy who turns you into a chatty Kathy. There is also the guy who makes you feel like you have not one right word to say. I’ve had both situations happen and it is the most nerve-wracking yet exhilarating experience. I live for moments like those. The excitement you get when you meet someone and he gives you butterflies every time you see him is fun at first but then you hate it. The guy has so much control over you and all you can think about is does he feel the same way about me? Why doesn’t he come over and talk to me when he sees me? I know he is checking for me. Man, the list goes on and on. It is the most annoying thing that females do. We give the guy way too much control over us early on. He senses that shit and runs away immediately. Yet, we keep doing it. We try to tell ourselves that we have learned from all of the mistakes in the past but we don’t. We like to get a refill in ways that are dangerous for our health and well-being. I know Elle was talking in about a positive, joyous refill but most of the time that refill never needs to happen. Sometimes an empty cup is exactly what we need.

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